Disability and Desires

Good evening and greetings from home where I'm getting ready for a last very busy period before my Christmas break. I had an outcall tonight which I thoroughly enjoyed once we got over the initial arrangements. My client had left specific instructions that the front door would be open and to lock the door behind me. I was to make my way through to the bedroom where he would be lying on the bed in wait, in his boxer shorts. My fee would be on a side table. After we indulged in an hour's fun and he climaxed twice, he gave me a lovely hug and a smile. The scenario he had described was not part of some bizarre ritual or fantasy, he has Cerebral Palsy.

We had a chat afterwards and he told me that he has encountered many ladies who were unwilling to see him simply due to his disability. I was very saddened to hear that, but he said as far as he's concerned it's their choice. Hmmm, I suppose it is their choice but for me personally, I don't care if a client has two heads provided he is clean and respectful towards me. I suppose it's worth mentioning at this point that my incall premises in Glasgow is fully wheelchair accessible and I am delighted to welcome disabled visitors. I also have experience in moving and lifting disabled people so as my client reminded me tonight, I will update my website to that effect in the next couple of days.

I have also joined this website :

http://www.tlc-trust.org.uk/

The TLC Trust aims to put sex workers in touch with disabled clients and has gone a long way towards dispelling much of the taboo around disability and sexuality. As I said to my guy this evening, disabled people have needs too, and I personally derive a huge amount of pleasure from my client's pleasure, especially when it has taken him so long to find someone willing to look after his needs.

From the TLC website, here is why the role of the escort / sex worker is so vitally important to the disabled person :

1) Blind people visit massage parlours in order to “see” beautiful bodies by massaging them.

2) Many disabled men and women are sexually abused when young, by family members, care workers, health professionals and priests. As a result, they may experience mental anguish and physical pain during sex as adults. Sex workers teach them how to relax and enjoy pain-free sex.

3) Deaf-blind people sometimes need to be taught how to pleasure themselves using physical instruction, and sex workers are brought in to supply this service.

4) Stroke survivors may become isolated whilst being unable to speak, a situation which can last for many years. Sex workers are on call to provide their expertise in non-verbal communication (as discussed at the Different Strokes AGM 2007 www.differentstrokes.co.uk).

5) Spinal injured people who have high levels of paralysis, and cannot touch the parts of their body that still have sensation, are provided with massage and sexual attention to re-learn sexual pleasure and live fulfilled lives. This important branch of specialist sex work is still not recognised by spinal injury units, but operates independently.

6) People with Parkinson's Disease often become very highly sexed and, when they have no outlet, and their arms are too weak to manage to masturbate, live in perpetual frustration. The services of sex workers are essential although may be beyond their financial means. It is inhumane not to offer financial assistance in these cases.

7) Disabled couples who cannot manage to get into the right positions and achieve intercourse are helped by sex workers who act as “enablers”. This only happens in a handful of residential homes, due to objections from other residents, relatives, prudish staff and even members of the governing board who should have their residents' wellbeing as their prime concern.

8) People in residential homes get cheered up when striptease evenings are organised. It is a chance to look at beautiful bodies, appreciated both by the male and female residents who choose to attend the show.

9) People with cerebral palsy who have no control over their limbs may need help to enjoy masturbation and sexual pleasure. This has many important benefits including reducing spasticity when, after the second orgasm, people who normally have no speech can actually talk for a few minutes.

10) When a clinical judgement has been made that someone with learning disabilities does not have the mental capacity to consent to sex, that person is condemned to a life without sexual contact with other people. It has been argued by lawyer John Blandford that if somebody has the ability to express sexual feelings and desires something other than masturbation, then they would have sufficient capacity for a sex worker to be booked. As the current law stands, however, they may even be deprived something as harmless as an anal dildo, which puts them at risk because, without it, they might shove something dangerous into their backside, which could disappear up inside, and/or cause damage.

11) Severely disabled people who cannot invite sex workers into their homes need to visit wheelchair accessible brothels that provide hoists and facilities for them to enjoy sex. It is thus essential that Britain has such a brothel in each city to meet this demand.

12) Sex workers become sexual physiotherapists for people who have had hip replacements, teaching them ways to enjoy sex without pushing the new hip out of joint.

13) Sex workers teach quadriplegics how to cope with autonomic dysreflexia during sexual activities.

14) Young people who are not expected to live very long, such as people with Duchene Muscular Dystrophy often feel that they want to have sex before they die, and sex workers provide such a service. In 2007, a Channel 5 TV programme featured Nick Wallis who persuaded the nuns and nurses in his respite home to organise a sex worker for him, and this was discussed in the Guardian and other media as a “good thing”. www.guardian.co.uk/society/2007/jan/15/health.socialcare

15) Sex workers encourage clients to gain the skills and confidence to find loving partners, and do a lot of teaching. Some even specialise in people whose disabilities make it very difficult to socialise and successfully ask someone out, such as people with Aspergers and other neuro-diversity.

16) Because many people with learning disabilities cannot read and forget what they are told, sex workers provide a valuable service teaching them safer sex practices.

17) Many disabled people and people with stammers suffer self-doubt, even self-dislike. They find that a sex worker can help change this around so they begin to accept and even love themselves, which is a positive step towards social acceptance and finding a partner.

18) Sex workers provide expertise to disabled people who have no other way of finding out what sexual pleasures their bodies are capable of.

19) Some sex workers use hypnosis to help disabled people who are stuck with negative sexual values and unsure about their sexuality.

20) Sex workers provide intimate friendship for single dying people. This good work is hindered by the fact that there is no provision for privacy for the service in British hospitals.

21) Sex workers provide experiences for disabled people who are unsure about their sexual orientation and have no other opportunities for experimentation.

22) Sex workers provide disabled people with the chance to try out various sex toys to enable them to find which one is best for them to enjoy sex, without having to waste money in a sex store.

23) Sex workers teach people who use catheters and have ostomies the best way to handle them during sex.

24) Because of limited opportunities, and inappropriate or lack of sex and relationship education, disabled people sometimes remain virgins until late in life and crave the experience of sex. Many are so scared they find it impossible to start a relationship. Sex workers are professionals who will not laugh at them, are experienced at seeing virgins, make sex seem less scary, will teach them expertise, instill confidence and prepare them for finding love.

25) Sex workers provide sexual relief and pleasure for disabled people whose parents/staff don't allow them to socialise or get dressed up, people who are housebound or cannot go out because they are agorophobic. They can also be a lifeline to disabled people living in residential care where the type of relationships they enjoy are forbidden, for example same-sex relationships.

26) Sex workers sometimes provide a service to couples. Perhaps one of them has a disability which prevents them from doing all the things they enjoy. For example, if the husband cannot get an erection, they might hire in a male sex worker so that sometimes their lovemaking can include the presence of an erect penis. Volunteers may also be found through contact magazines, but some couples feel safer with a sex worker.

27) Sex workers are good at teaching disabled people who use AAC (augmentative alternative ways of communication) to gain the confidence and practice at using the right vocabulary to chat people up, flirt and enjoy sexual communication.

28) Sex workers do the invaluable job of helping disabled people over the hurdle of feeling sexy and letting themselves be sexual, when they are normally trapped in an asexual clinical environment.

29) Sex Workers help disabled people with spasticity, dealing with flexor spasms and help them find positions that suit them and even use spasms during sexual activity.

30) Sex workers provide disabled fetishists with the physical help they need to enjoy their fetishes when they cannot manage on their own.

31) Sex workers provide a sexual service for people who are suffering from fatigue due to their disability, be it ME or MS, or whatever. They are paid to make “all the moves and do all the work” which is not usually considered acceptable in relationships where money is not involved.

32) Some sex workers specialise in coaching disabled people in dating skills and finding the right partner. This usually involves a “girlfriend or boyfriend experience” repeated over several sessions.

33) Sex workers can help people who experience chronic pain, such as people with arthritis and other connective tissue diseases, and more specifically those with carpal tunnel syndrome who get shooting pains when trying to masturbate, so that they can overcome the pain and enjoy sexual fulfillment.

34) Sex workers are there for parents who want their adult sons and daughters to learn about sex in a safe environment and provide a reliable service. This is especially true with sons and daughters who have learning disabilities and only meet others their age with learning disabilities, and they worry that they will be abused or catch sexually transmitted diseases through ignorance or forgetfulness.

35) Sex workers provide choice for disabled people so they are not patronised by the state interfering with their personal freedoms. The fact that sex workers are prepared to take risks for the personal happiness of disabled people is to be commended. Pye Jakobsson who currently sells sexual services in Sweden (where the purchase of sex is illegal and consequently sex workers work in danger) says that her disabled clients are her best clients: they even sent her cheques when Pye was too ill to work, to help her pay the rent.

36) Sex workers cheer people up – producing endorphines during sex so that people feel less depressed. Tantric sex workers train to ensure that clients (and they too) do not feel empty or sad after the sex session has ended.

37) Sex workers help people find ways of coping with cognitive issues that impede their connection to their sexuality.

38) Sex workers help people with MS and Spina Bifida find alternative routes to orgasm, when the usual routes are blocked by their impairments.

39) Sex workers work with therapists to help disabled people deal with psychological and physical problems. This is sometimes call sexual surrogacy.

40) Sex workers help disabled people live out the fantasy of being beautiful and sexy and desirable, momentarily escaping the social stigma of their disability, and learning how to project a positive image to the rest of society.

41) Escorts provide status to disabled people when out socialising, so that other people see them as sexually desirable, raising their potential to find a loving partner.

42) Sex workers can provide one of the most important human basic needs: touch. Many nerve endings in our skin crave to be stroked, caressed and held. Touch deprivation is torture, like any other sensory deprivation. Moreover, the right kind of touch helps people overcome negative feelings that have come from abusive touch. Sexual touching is essential to mental health. Through the TLC website and the Sex and Disability Helpline, in early 2008, British sex workers rescued a blind man living in the Midlands who, at the age of 72, had never ever even had a cuddle.

43) In the modern-day world where so-called physical perfection is seen as the gateway to success, both in the workplace and socially, sex workers provide refuge for those who do not fit into this ideal. Their very acceptance of people with disabilities is a nirvana, their warmth and friendliness a lifeline and the only reason why their praises cannot be sung more widely is that many disabled people, living in poverty, cannot afford to hire them.

44) Many disabled people, especially men, find that staff and health professionals actively discourage them from starting relationships, manipulating the situation so that new friendships and potential relationships fail. So it is very refreshing and comforting to be in the company of a sex worker who is not working against them.

45) Many people with severe disabilities go through life with no personal privacy. From childhood, when parents open letters and parcels for them, through school and college, every detail of their life is shared with others. So it is extremely special to visit a sex worker who will keep everything that happens between them totally confidential.

46) Married people and those who are in a relationship and become disabled often find that the balance of their relationship is upset and the relationship ends. The disabled person is left feeling “on the scrap heap”, rejected and without hope. Sex workers are there to rescue such people, teach them to live to their full potential, and set them on the road to self acceptance and the road to finding a new partner.

47) Sex workers help raise the self-esteem of people who are disfigured and disabled, and provide a much needed sexual service. Indeed, members of the French Foreign Legion were permitted to visit brothels on the understanding that it's good for morale and relieves stress.

48) It would be a sad injustice if service personnel such as soldiers badly wounded and disfigured in Iraq and Afganistan were banned from the help they can receive from sex workers.

49) In different cultures, disability brings shame to the family, and many disabled people believe they must have been bad in a past life. Such people may well be embarrassed about their disabled bodies. Most sex workers are well aware of this shame, and work hard to help the disabled person shed their shame and overcome the embarrassment.

50) Finally, but very importantly, may disabled women are fed up with partners who are rough and/or unskilled, or treat them like trash. They dream of paying for sex so that they can be in “expert hands”. Many such women are put off because it is actually very difficult to find a male sex worker – the Internet featuring agencies charging men high prices to join (with no hope of a client), amateurs offering their services and a high degree of charlatanism. This is a direct result of the trade being quasi-legal and unregulated. Most women only feel safe when a personal recommendation is made but there are few “experts” to make such recommendations, and being paid to do so would be illegal.

Speaking of disablements, I was reading Dollymopp's blog earlier on and she is in severe pain with a condition that looks like it may hinder her work and certainly her day to day life. Huge amounts of love and hugs to you Dolly. xxx

Tomorrow I'm off to Inverness and from there I'm joining my slave for the weekend. After that I will be on holidays for a week as I am going home to join my family for Christmas. Speak to you from Inverness.

LL xx

Aberdeen, Articles and Assumptions

Good evening and greetings fae Aberdeen. I found this amazing article from 2007 today written by Howard Jacobson :


"The sexual instinct is a hydra-headed beast. It would be wrong of me to deny the violence which attaches to prostitution but there's more than one way of being in denial, and those who see only oppressive exploitation in the transaction between prostitute and client also fail to honour the complexities of sex. Some men might go to prostitutes to "use" them, but not all do. The exchange of money is freighted with meaning, and part of what it entails is the man's desire to hold himself cheap, to put himself at the pleading end of the power exchange, to abnegate his masculinity. Without doubt some men go to prostitutes to do them harm; but some go to harm themselves. Others, of course, go because they're desperate, and if paying money is the only way they'll find erotic company for a night, an hour, or just five minutes, then they'll pay it. And some simply go because they can, because they've nothing else to do, because they're bored and feeling hot, want nothing other than an uncomplicated good time, and intend no evil or disrespect by it.

That a prostitute might occasionally be touched by a man's shyness, or made curious by his need to hurt himself, or softened by his loneliness, or just amused by his idle pleasure-seeking – that she might, without being a fictionalised tart with a heart, find something for herself in any of these conditions – does not seem to me impossible. If you don't accept that – if you won't have it that a man can have any motive for visiting a prostitute other than the exercise of brute power – then yours is as vile a view of human nature as the pimp's or pusher's. And if you can't imagine the prostitute being humane enough, sometimes, to be intrigued, softened, engaged or even aroused, then yours is the low view of woman."

What a fantastic statement and it made me smile to see that someone, somewhere gets it. The tart with a heart is not a myth, I have met many women in my time who are beautiful inside and out. In my former home town I found it ironic to stand in a queue in a shop one day and overhear a conversation ; " Did you hear about so and so ? A hooker !! And I always thought she was such a lovely girl."

ARRRGHHH !!

I am and will always be, a lovely girl. I am not defined by my chosen profession, rather my chosen profession is an extension of the hidden and fun loving whore I always knew was lurking beneath.

Overall it's been a great week for me, I had a ball in Edinburgh last week and hooked up with some friends for dinner too. Rachel Rossi, Manchester Amber and Crista were all in Edinburgh too so we had a right laugh. For as long as I live I will have fond memories of Crista and I standing outside our 5 star hotel amusing passers by with our "When Harry met Sally" impressions. Pair of nutters.

This week in the news I was aghast to see that Glasgow City Council are calling for the purchase of sex to be made illegal.

West Renfrewshire Labour MSP Trish Godman said she planned to propose changes to planned and existing legislation at Holyrood in the coming weeks.

She said: "We believe these amendments present a simple but devastatingly effective means of challenging demand for prostitution.

"Introducing these amendments as law would ensure that anyone involved in the purchase, marketing or facilitation of sexual services would be criminalised whether these acts took place on the street or indoors.

"Every shred of evidence indicates that prostitution is inherently harmful. It is incredible that something which so clearly breaches an individual's right to dignity, equality, respect and physical and mental well-being has gone unhindered for so long."

Err, what about my right to make a living and support my family ? What about my right to privacy when I do what I do behind closed doors between consenting adults ?
Is it better for my "mental well-being" to fund my degree by claiming benefits ?

Turning back to Glasgow City Council for a moment, if you look at their website which is http://www.endprostitutionnow.org/, you come across this "job description";

"HELP WANTED: Women and girls do you want this job?

Are you tried of mindless, low skilled, low-paying jobs? Would you like a career with flexible hours? Working with people? Offering a professional service?

• No experience required! No qualifications needed. No minimum age requirement. On the job training provided.

• Special opportunities for poor women – exotic looking women - single mothers – women of colour

• Women and girls applying for this position will provide the following services:

• Being penetrated orally, anally and vaginally with penises, fingers, fists and objects, including but not limited to bottles, brushes, dildos, guns and/or animals;

•Being bound and gagged, tied with ropes and/or chains, burned with cigarettes, or hung from beams or trees."

How offensive. To me that deems us women of limited intellect who have little or no control over what happens to our bodies. I would suggest that I have more control over my body than the ladies who go out on a Friday night and get absolutely smashed, before going home and sleeping with some reprobate they found in a club.

No-one is going to deny that trafficking happens in Scotland, I know it happens. I also know that banning the purchase of sex will drive the industry underground and it will become nigh on impossible to reach those women who so desperately need our help. If we didn't have street workers in Glasgow and they were in legalised brothels then the violence towards them would deplete and the outreach services would have a far easier job in contacting them.

As an aside, how exactly are they going to make it an offence to purchase sex in Scotland when Edinburgh City Council make the money they do from the "Annual Entertainments Licence Fee" that they charge the local saunas ? Either they give up their lucrative income or they oppose the proposed legislative changes. Hmmm, it's a close call. ;)

Oh well, as I said earlier on Twitter this week, I'll try to remember how downtrodden I am when I have my slave bitch handcuffed to the bed and am flogging his ass.

Nite,

LL xx

Glasgow, Gimps and Gumtree

Good evening, and greetings from a hotel room in Dundee. First of all let me share the happy news with you, I can now offer Glasgow incalls. I have the use of a beautiful apartment just off Argyll Street and I'm thrilled to bits. Now for the bad news. I need four hours notice. This is because I need to organise things my end and also to ensure I look drop dead gawjus to see you. So, if you're Glasgow based and fed up with presentations on projected performance for the coming quarter, you know what to do. Similarly, if you're visiting Glasgow and need a break from the standard "entertainment" provided by your Glasgow based colleagues, you know where I am, just make sure you email in advance.

Anyway, guess who got in touch ? Yes, my slave bitch. I've not heard from him for so long. He has booked a weekend of torture in December and I am looking forward to it so much. He will cook me dinner, take me shopping, make sure my every need is attended to and in turn I will handcuff him to the bathroom sink and just leave him there. A fair exchange, I'm sure you'll agree.

Anyway, I'm in kinda a playful mood tonight so I was perusing the "casual relationships" section of Glasgow Gumtree this evening. I came across this little belter :

"Glasgow guy seeking sexual adventure with willing female participant. Must have all ten fingers and eyebrows. I have high standards.

Would also like to travel as my place is shit. I live in the town underneath a couple who batter each other and above a violin teacher. The blend of Mozart over domestic warfare is ideal shaggin atmosphere if you're a complete psycho. Seriously though you can come to my place.

Sex for me involves fumbling around for a while before 'sticking it in' but if you're nice then I'll throw in some massages or spanking or whatever else you're into. No playing with jobbie on a stick though, it's just no my thing.

Not really fussy but huge tits would be a nice bonus as would a sense of humour.

Again I'm 26, tall and slim and really really good looking with an enormous cock. Did I mention that already?

Lookin forward to all 3 replies.

xx

P.S No Gypsies."

So, I've decided to email this gent back and see what happens.

"Dear Glasgow Guy,

You have no idea how relieved I was to read your ad and discover that another human being is going through the hell that I endure on a daily basis. You should count yourself lucky with your warring couple, I myself have a group of Emos living downstairs who delight in listening to heavy metal and moshing. Quite why anyone would derive pleasure from hurling themselves against each other, much less clashing heads is anyone's guess. I for one believe in freedom of expression, but when it puts me off my climatic stroke with my rampant rabbit, it becomes problematic.

Anyway, I've jumped ahead of myself, my name is Laura and I'm a Catholic. Please don't delete the email at this point. I would love to meet you but it simply means that we would need to have a short marriage ceremony beforehand. Don't panic, you can always divorce me afterwards on the grounds on unreasonable behaviour, and I have it on the best authority that "unreasonable" is an understatement.

The only concern I have is your stipulation at the end of your ad that you would prefer "No gypsies". Let me say from the outset, my heritage has never been in question to me, but according to my cousin Assumpta Immaculata my Great Grand Mother's nephew's hamster was a tinker. I don't know why I'm even bringing this up, Assumpta has a nerve, the last time that girl wore knickers was during the great blizzard of 1982, and even then, legend has it that the only reason they remained intact was because she hadn't had a bath in 6 weeks and it took 4 units of Highlands and Islands Fire Brigade to get them off. ( Unusual for her, but there you are. )

So, email me back and let's see how we get on. For the record, I bathe at least once a week, and I've bought some leopard print knickers in Primark, specially like.

Laura xx

I shall of course let you know how I get on. ;)

Schooling, socials and smashing times

I think I'm turning into my Mother. Not the nauseatingly annoying bit, but I hear myself say things and it's like turning the wheels of time backwards 25 years.

Such gems as ;

"I'll give you a real reason to cry in a minute".

or

"Don't come crying to me when you've been knocked from your bike and killed because you wouldn't wear the reflective arm bands."

If some kind soul could email me a link to the current suggested school curriculum I'd be very grateful because I think the education system has a lot to answer for. Take last week for example. I committed the horrid atrocity of actually asking my little treasure to tidy her room unaided, since I had already brought the cleaning equivalent of a JCB through it twice. Cue an unmerciful row which culminated in tiny hands being applied firmly to hips and then the clincher ;

"I may be small but I have a voice and I deserve to be heard."

Well, suffice to say that the only voice to be heard in the immediate aftermath was mine, at a pitch and a volume that had my kitties diving for cover in the broom cupboard.

*sigh*

Last Thursday I thoroughly enjoyed an overnight with Mr F, we had food to die for and he bought me a beautiful pair of earrings for Christmas. It just goes to show how much I trust him, one of the earrings went straight through but the other ear has semi healed over. So I took a large mouthful of wine ;

"Right, just do it."

"Are you sure ?"

"Aye".

Many howls later and we still couldn't manage it so I need to get that one pierced again. Oh joy. Anyway, the next day we were both attending a social lunch which was superb. Beautiful food and the best of craic. Big Rick was there too and I think he was a little nervous as it was his first social but as it was a daytime meet it was relatively civilised, the next one will be a haze of doubles, hehe. The last time I was in Aberdeen Rick gave me a pressie and I've attached a picture. It's a name badge which says " Laura Lee, 5* Tour Guide ". How cool is that ? I wore it with pride at the social and will do so at future events too. :)

From the social I sprinted home, did a handstand in the shower and set off to meet Mr A for the weekend. I have long made it my mission to put the "f" back into sex, by which I mean fun. Why does it have to be so goddamn serious ? Some people approach bedroom olympics like a military operation. The second part of that mission is to bring a sense of perspective back into "Senior Management" types. I have very happy memories of perching on an armchair in Glasgow one night with my client seated at my feet. He was using management speak and waxing lyrical about the expenditure for his latest project, so I kicked him over.

"Oh my God, did you just kick me over ?"

"I did, yep."

"No-one has dared to give me cheek for years, let alone kick me. Thank you."

So back to Mr A. We were enjoying champagne and strawberries when he started to wind me up. ( He does it very well. ) The closest thing to hand was a large scatter cushion so it was duly fired in his general direction, but missed, and instead took out several glass tumblers. Now, most people would have stopped there but for all his management training he has obviously glossed over the chapter on "When to concede defeat," and so it went on until neither of us had any energy left.

It was a wonderful weekend which we both thoroughly enjoyed. :)

This week sees me heading off to Dundee on Wednesday and Thursday before landing in Edinburgh on Friday. I shall speak to you from there.

LL xx

Studies, Santa and Socials

Good evening and greetings from deepest darkest Ayrshire from behind a pile of A4 paper which resembles the inbox at the AOL complaints department. I have been very busy completing my latest assignment tonight because it's due by mid-day tomorrow. All is peaceful and quiet and my boy cat is curled up beside me fellating himself in a nonchalant manner. I suppose it's revenge for my playing cat porn on You - tube earlier which resulted in his sprinting for the door. I know, I'm very mean.

The "C" word is almost upon us and although I love spending time with my loved ones and chilling out, the mayhem in the lead up to it is a pain in my curvaceous backside. This year my little treasure has decided she'd like Santa to bring her ( inter alia ) a guitar. I could have cried, not least because my Dad rather helpfully offered to get her a drum kit to go with it. I could hear the smile in his voice when he said it but it didn't stop the almost unbearable desire to throttle him.

Once my assignment is submitted it's a quick metamorph from me, the tracksuit clad, pale and very uninteresting student to my far more glamorous alter-ego. I have it down to a fine art and can do the total transformation in an hour. On Thursday night I am meeting Mr F for an overnight and looking forward to it immensely. We always have the best of craic and I think I'll wear "that" dress which means I can't bend over at all, well, not until we get back to the bedroom anyway, hehe.

Friday afternoon and I'm off to a social lunch in Glasgow with other lewdies from the industry and it will be brilliant to catch up with my friends. Straight from there I'm into a taxi and off to meet Mr A for the weekend, another of my guys who always spoils me rotten. I'm a lucky, lucky girl when I think about the regular clients I have.

On that happy note I'm going back to the books and to hoosh my porn cat from the sofa.

Nite,

LL xx

Publications, ponderings and previous

Wednesday last saw the publication of an excellent piece in The Guardian by Catherine Stephens where she said that if the government wants to reduce the social exclusion of sex workers, they should consult us when consulting on new laws. She said :

"Sex workers themselves are the experts on their own lives. As the origin of many political and civil rights organisations, including the Labour party itself, shows, the way to prevent exploitation is to recognise the human, civil and labour rights of stigmatised and excluded groups. Sex workers have been denied these rights for too long."

Absolutely agree and very well said. I don't feel that the current prohibitory mood is doing anything to help our stance as sex workers in society in terms of stigma and marginalisation. As a sex worker, I don't ask anyone to "like" what I do for a living, after all I'm not particularly enamoured with traffic wardens. What I do seek ( and believe I deserve ) is respect, and the same rights as any other self - employed individual in the UK.

As usual, there were a mixture of comments following Catherine's piece but she argued back in a most measured and calm fashion. She even dared to allow her sense of humour to come through. That in itself came under fire because you see, prostitutes are so embittered and hardened that we couldn't possibly have a sense of humour. *sigh*

Today's papers also made me smile, not least the article by Ian Bell in The Herald : "Prostitution's vile, but is it wrong ?" The crux of his article was simply this ; Ask the average person for his/her opinion on prostitution and the answer will most likely be that they find it abhorrent. If we dig deeper and find the root of that distaste, it won't be the actual prostitution that's the issue, but rather, the perceived associated moral wrongs, such as coercion, violence, underage girls and drugs.

So what if we strip away all of those associated crimes and examine prostitution as a single, legal and regulated entity ? What then ? What can we say is actually wrong with it ?

"We would have to think, to begin with, why such a state of affairs has never before pertained. History tells it plain. For every celebrated courtesan with a fancy invented name, in every age, there has been an entire immiserated class of women, disposed of as men saw fit. This implies, beyond much doubt, that prostitution is the way it is, and has always been, not because of a shortage of the lucky, smiling Belle de Jour sorts, but because men make that choice.

It’s called hypocrisy. It’s the politician in the massage parlour; the judge who has no idea that his car has slowed to a crawl; those ministers attending the General Assembly who were, or perhaps still are, the stuff of Edinburgh legend. They make, enforce, commend or applaud the law as though to ensure that there is a law worth breaking, and an illicit thrill to be had. They create criminals for their pleasure. The cliche is antique: the vast ­­majority of prostitution’s customers – and the numbers are vast – are respectable.

Should society tolerate the horrors of the sex industry? Such appears, after all, to be the proposition: either/or. Either we continue to keep prostitution in murderous darkness, it says, or we risk the stability of the daylight world. Why does that sound like nonsense?

The sex industry is vile because the men who run it and use it would have it no other way. They are not acting out of social conscience. One group wants easy money; the other wants to pay for the chance to use helpless women on command and according to whim.

Dr Magnanti, “Belle de Jour” – who sounds as though she has never seen the bleak film – has provided the trade with a fresh set of glib, glamorous and deceitful excuses. She was lucky. The countless women forced to pretend to play her game will never be so fortunate.

Why not? Because, I suspect, men couldn’t stand to see those women making the free choices, sexual and economic, that liberated prostitution would allow. Sheer slavery is tolerated instead. For the common good."



Bravo Mr. Bell.

Also today was this very balanced and perceptive view from India Knight in The Times :

"Two things struck me in the aftermath of my interview with Belle de Jour last week. The first is that several of my female colleagues in the media appeared to be deeply personally offended by the fact that Belle, or rather Dr Brooke Magnanti, wasn’t at any point raped or beaten up during the 14 months she spent as a call girl.

There were vague disclaimers to the effect of “of course, thankfully, nothing terrible happened to Magnanti”, but the basic thrust — as it were — of their argument was that the lack of rapes/beatings meant that her experience was not representative of prostitution and therefore fraudulent in some way. But how would they know what was or wasn’t representative unless they’d been in a lot of rooms with a lot of customers themselves?

Magnanti never suggested that her experience was anything other than subjective, but she did tell me “the vast majority” of her clients “were more polite, nicer and treated me better than many ‘normal’ men on dates. No one wants to be ‘that guy’ [the one who abuses prostitutes]. Besides the agency had their real name, their real landline number, their real credit card details”. She had, she said “never left an appointment” before time was up and only two clients had made her feel uneasy.

Now that Belle has outed herself, I wonder why it remains so difficult for people — or indeed the law — to understand that not all prostitutes conform to the stereotype of the abused, trafficked, addicted victim. Of course such women exist in vast, shaming and regrettable numbers. But to claim, as so many commentators did last week, that this is the only version of prostitution that exists seems to me extraordinarily naive."

*wild applause*

No-one can now deny that there is a huge cross section within the sex industry and that it is simply not acceptable to use a sledgehammer to crack a nut in terms of planning legislation. Is the tide finally turning ? I sincerely hope so.

I also liked the comment in relation to the difference between "normal" dates and paid encounters. I am very fortunate to have a number of regular clients who treat me like a very special lady in their lives, and that's because I am. Our relationships run far deeper than a paid sex encounter and have developed into lasting friendships, based on trust, loyalty and an openness that I never experienced in some of my previous "personal" relationships. I will freely admit that in the past I allowed one or two of my previous partners to treat me like a toy, to be cast aside when they were bored with me, and when I look back now, the whole relationship was based on ritual humiliation and emotional abuse. My, how times have changed.

None of my regular guys would even attempt those kind of head games with me, after all, when you're tied to a bed and blindfolded, it's probably not the best time to goad me into psychological warfare. ;)

Nite,

LL xx

Feck-ups and Firemen ( again )

All I can say is I'm glad today is over. It was fun but everything that could possibly go wrong did go wrong. I checked into my hotel this afternoon after horrendous delays on that carpark they have the gall to call a motorway, the M8. I was stuck in the car for over 40 minutes all in all apologising profusely to my first client because I was running late, whilst trying desperately to control my temper because Glasgow's answer to Denis the Menace was gurning at me out the back window of his parent's car. Little *$!&%.

Eventually I got settled in and my first appointment went fine. Since I have been doing very well on the studying front I decided to pop out of the hotel to pick up some wine for this evening. It was like I had stepped into a parallel universe because the reception area was filled with blind people. Apparently there was some form of conference on. Anyway as I was making my way to the revolving door, I noticed a gentleman with a white stick hanging back and trying desperately to guage when to go through the door. Ever the helpful soul ( I was in The Brownies, you know ) I asked him,

"Do you want me to tell you when to go ?"

"Oooh, that would be smashing, thank you."

What he should have mentioned is that he is a little hard of hearing too, because when I said "Now", he turned and said "What ?" before launching himself at the door and going face first into the glass panel. I swear, it could only have happened to me. Numerous people jumped up to see if he was ok, all the while glaring at me like the spawn of Satan.

"I was only trying to help, and see, what happened was, I said now, but he ... "

It didn't seem to matter as they were all too concerned with circling him and looking at me like the dirt from my cat's paw. I decided to beat a hasty retreat and set off to get my wine. At the pavement side there were two more delegates, but I decided to leave them to it, I had done enough damage for one day.

Finally, I got back to my room and waited for the world's most nervous client whom I have been speaking to via email for quite some time. He'd never met a lady of negotiable virtue before so I welcomed him in and offered him a full body massage to begin with, because he was literally shaking like a leaf. He was a lovely, lovely man and the moment of mutual engagement had just started in missionary position when the fecking fire alarm went off. He lost his erection almost as quickly as I lost the will to live. So we left the hotel via separate fire exits and he bolted off into the night, presumably never to be heard from again.

So there we are. A day in the life, huh ? I wouldn't mind, but three units of Strathclyde Fire Brigade couldn't produce one good looking fireman between them. It was like Krufts.

So I'm off to quaff vast amounts of white wine and contemplate for the 8 millionth time how I ever became the Frank Spencer of escorts.

Nite,

LL xx